I am Jack

Hi, there. You can call me Jack. That’s not my real name, but it will have to do because I have children to consider. I prefer they don’t discover this blog and see their father pouring his heart out about his marriage. All they need to know right now is that their mother and father love them very much. I’m sure they will discover or piece together the details in time but for now, I want them to be children and not worry about adult problems.

It’s been over a month since the incident occurred. It’s going to be hard to talk about but I think it’s necessary. When I was reeling from shock, grief, anger, and depression, I searched the Internet, looking for articles and blogs about my situation. I needed to know I wasn’t alone. I needed to read about it to try to get a hold of the chaos in my mind and start to process everything.

I found one blog in particular that helped me see that life goes on. Of course, life goes on. We grow and we move on but in those first minutes, hours, days after the trauma, the pain can be overwhelming and it’s hard to believe that there is an ‘after’. Thank you so much, dear writer at https://endofamarriageandbeginningabetterlife.wordpress.com/. Your blog posts gave me something to hold onto when I felt I was drowning.

Now, I believe we can all relate to each other’s experiences regardless of race or gender. I am a male but I had no issues reading and relating to a female blogger.  That said, I think a uniquely male perspective on this kind of experience can be helpful to other men out there who are suffering. Men and women aren’t as different as some people want us to believe, but we’re still different. Just look at all the articles offering opinions on why women cheat vs. why men cheat.

Anyway, this blog is not about what society thinks or “expert” opinions. I read enough of that. What really helped me was reading one woman’s journey through the pain of betrayal and the years that followed. Now, I’m offering my perspective for anybody who is suffering regardless of your gender, but if you’ve been looking specifically for a male perspective, well, here it is.

I really don’t know where to begin. I’m sure I’m going bounce around the timeline. I have a month’s worth of journal entries to pull from and 16 years of memories with her to reflect on.

So, let’s get started. Remember, we’re all in this together.

Jack

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